Interviews

Ballot Hot Box

Interviews

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The recent election in Iran, and all the controversy surrounding it (which has led to violence and multiple deaths), is on the minds of many Americans.  Here is Westchester County USA, there is a small population of Iranians that are showing concern for the  situation back in their home country.  The political correspondent for Westcheddar, warmly known as Bon Don, took time out of his day to catch me up to speed as to what is going with the election, and how the internet, more specifically Youtube and social networking sites/blogs, are guiding the revolution in Iran.  It is important to note that he, like many Iranians living in the U.S., came here with his family for a better way of life and to live free as an American citizen.  But he has never forgotten his roots, and is passionate about what is at stake with this election.

 

IP:  For those people out there living under a rock, tell us what’s the situation over in Iran with the latest election.

 

BD:  I’ll start with the latest events and work backwards in time.  Currently the people are in the sixth day or so of demonstrations because there is an electorate that is simply fed up with the current living and working standards in Iran.

 

After claimed and firmly believable evidence of voter fraud, the current government apparatus claimed (Mahmoud Ahmadinejad ) as the President only two hours after the election booths were closed. You can not count millions of paper votes in two hours.

 

People began to march in the streets and peacefully protest. As in all of the radically run countries, the government tried to bully and stop the voice of the people. The Iranian people are highly educated and informed citizens who don’t want to live in an Islamic state which forces them into idleness.

 

Subsequently, the media began to cover this closely and so did social media networks. Videos and reports began to leak out.  Demonstrators continued, the government began to send non-uniformed police agents, basij soldiers (military police / former Iran Iraq war hardened war veterans) and riot police into the streets to quell this resounding disapproval of the current system. They began to beat people to scare them. But protestors instead continued to march and began reporting the events via YouTube, Twitter, and various blogs.

 

The people continued to protest. The international media was then ordered by the government to stop reporting and forced to stay in the confines of their hotels, etc.

 

IP:  What is life like for young people in Iran?  Do they get a good education?  Do they party?

 

BD:  It is miserable. You wake up at 3-4 in the afternoon and go to the coffee shop to hang out. You then go to dinner and then go and party all night because there is nothing productive you can do. The government has total control and has flooded the country with drugs and alcohol to numb the people into submission, yet they vociferously claim they are good Muslims.

 

The people who become educated as doctors have to drive taxis because they don’t make any money being a doctor due to high inflation and corruption.

 

IP:  How do they feel about their role in government?

 

BD:  They have no role. The government is a very tight Islamic Council led by Ayatollah Ali Khameni who has been challenged due to his iron grip and lack of legitimacy. The Supreme Council then decides, supports, and allows a President to be elected as their puppet.

 

IP:  You started a Twitter page to update what’s going on with the election.  It seems like technology is playing a big role in getting the word out about what’s going on.  Beyond television, how are things like Youtube and Twitter HELPING this youth movement against the government?

 

BD:  This, as people have noted, is the first internet led revolution. It is empowering people to be heard internationally. Any human being in their right mind after witnessing a women get beaten will not turn a blind eye. This is historic. The Iranian people, due to their ingenuity and creativeness, have worked around an iron clad information prevention apparatus. They have setup vpn (virtual private networks), and hackers from outside Iran have jammed government systems, and then there are servers that are used as proxies to get the content and information out into the information highway.

 

IP:  What role is the U.S. playing in what’s going on over there?  As a U.S. citizen from Iran, how do you feel they can be helpful?

 

BD:  The U.S. is mum.  Nothing.  They want to hedge their bets and don’t want to repeat the mistakes made under President Carter, who inadvertently meddled and caused the 1979 revolution. The U.S. government knows that would give political ammunition to the Iranian government.  Also, the U.S. government’s main aim is the prevention of nuclear proliferation. I think in back channels if the opposition party agrees to not pursue nuclear weapons, the administration will change course and support the opposition publicly. Currently they are carefully monitoring the situation.

 

IP:  Do you have a network of Iranian family and friends here in the U.S.?  What has been there reaction to all of this?

 

BD:  Not as much as I would like , but I do have some and we have begun to organize to take a stand.

 

IP:  Do they like hip hop in Iran?  What’s the popular music?

 

BD:  Yes, If you see many of the videos over there, they are politically rapping the issues. It is unprecedented.  They actually set the trend of the Kayne West, tight clothes wearing phenomena. The Iranian people are a very soulful society hostage under a group of religious elite who do opium and live luxuriously off of oil.

 

IP:  What about sports?

 

BD:  Soccer.

 

IP:  How do you foresee this whole situation shaping up?  What is a realistic solution to all of this?  Will it take violence more violence to solve the problems in Iran?

 

BD:  It is hard to tell. It can erupt or continue. One thing is for sure the government is scared to the bone. They are now answerable to the people. I think it will continue and it will result into a new Supreme Leader, less control, a new President, and more freedom. You know, in historical terms, we go through similar periods. During the Bush administration, it was very autocratic and very militaristic in nature.  Now with Obama and globalization and the internet, we will see more moderate open governments.

 

IP:  Any last thoughts?

 

BD:  I WANT A FREE IRAN . I want to see Iranian people compete with China and India as a nation. We have vast resources and we need to have a say in the international community.

 

 


On The Reg

Interviews

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Eastbound and Down, the laugh out loud HBO comedy mini-series, is coming out on DVD at the end of the month.  Steve Little (above left) plays Stevie, middle school teacher slash Kenny Powers’ assistant.  Love that guy.  Sooooo funny.  Heeb Magazine, a top notch Jewish publication, recently did a great interview with Little.  Click the link below to read.  And cop the DVD when it comes out if you know what’s good for you…

Heeb Magazine Interview with Steve Little of Eastbound and Down

Ipcus Interviews

Interviews, My Dudes, Stan Ipcus

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My young boy Jae Boogz from WP (above—peep the Dirty Jax shirt) had me on his college radio show recently to talk about all sorts of Stan Ipcus related stuff.  It’s a pretty thorough interview, touching on a bunch of different subjects.  He recently just started working with the Hot 97 Ciph and Rosenberg morning show, which is a good look for him.  Check the link to the interview and to his website where he posts all his shows below…

Stan Ipcus on The Warm Up Show with Jae Boogz

www.jaeboogz.com

I also just did an interview with an old schoolmate of mine Erez at shemspeed.com, a very popular jewish music website.  He asked me some interesting questions about what drives me to make music, religion, and of course growing up in WP with Matisyahu…check the print…

Stan Ipcus interview with Shempeed

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logoAnd since we’re getting up close and personal, check the videos below of me and Max Bee driving in NYC….First he does a quick little LETTER F beatbox, then he kicks something for me to spit over…something light….check it…

Hollerrr.

Dark Wars

Interviews, Stan Ipcus, Youth

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I posted about Mr. Youtube (above) before here at Westcheddar, one of the stars of the Get Light dance craze that is sweeping across the 5 boroughs and up to where I work in Westchester County.  My interest in the dance style, which is very popular with urban youth right now in the NYC area, started mainly from having so many kids come into my Cultural Arts Center wanting to Get Light, watching all the youtube videos of battles and new moves, and practicing their own moves in the center.  Eventually they started making their own videos to post, and continue to do so.  In fact, last night we just filmed a new one.

After forming a friendship with my boy Craig at Bombin Magazine, who interviewed me for a Stan Ipcus online feature a few months ago, I expressed an interest to him in doing a story on “getting light” for his next issue.  I put him on to the dance videos of Mr. Youtube and others I posted here at Westcheddar and he was really into the idea.  So from there I contacted the man behind the movement, D Cole.

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I figured D Cole (above) was the guy to get at, since almost all the videos I watched online had his label on them and were from his youtube page.  I shot him an email through youtube, and he called me that day, and invited me to his upcoming event, promising he would have Mr. Youtube and other big names like Chrybaby Cozie (bottom left, who has appeared in some popular music videos including Ron Browz “Pop Champagne” and Chris Brown’s “Kiss Kiss”) in the building for me to talk to.  It was exactly what I needed for my story.

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The event took place during the holidays at a dance studio in midtown Manhattan, and it was awesome.  There were kids from all over New York, many who traveled quite a distance to get there, ready to battle and make a name for themselves.  I quickly found out that it was no longer called Get Light, but rather GET DARK, a movement D Cole leads and promotes heavily through his videos, clothing, and of course his DARK WARS.  He organizes all the events, shoots and posts all the videos, and acts as a father figure to many of the dancers involved (though I must note there were a bunch of parents in the building, all in support of their kids and D Cole’s movement).  He’s a great guy, and after being around him, it’s easy to see why everyone looks up to him.  Keep an eye out for the new issue of Bombin Magazine for my full story behind D Cole’s DARK WARS, and check out the 4 part Behind the Scenes video I put together, filled with interviews and dance footage that explain and show exactly what it means to GET DARK, and a slideshow of pics I got at the event…

*Slideshow*

Part 1 D Cole Interview etc….

Part 2 Mr. Youtube, Chrybaby Cozie Interview etc….

Part 3 More Interviews and an Ill Battle!!!!

Part 4 Exclusive Mr. Youtube, Chrybaby Cozie, and Rayn Dance Footage

Shout out to Bombin Magazine, check out the story on their blog too:

Bombin Magazine blog DARK WARS

Special thanks to D Cole!!!!

Magic Mike

Interviews, My Dudes, The Good Old Days

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Michael Howard Friedland is a very skilled guy.  He’s good at a lot of things.  He’s athletic, musical, intellectual, and let’s face it, he’s extremely socialable.  But the thing that always blew me away about him, ever since we met in 9th grade at White Plains High School, was his ability to do magic, especially card tricks.  Sure, he’s pulled a quarter or two out of my ear, but it’s these card tricks that are really amazing.

After graduating from Tufts University, Friedland got into the business world, and excelled in it.  But now, he’s decided to pursue other interests with his stage show A.D.D. LIGHTFUL.  The show sold out it’s first run in Manhattan last fall, and now he’s back with a second set of shows, which show off his magic, musicianship, and charming personality.  I wonder if the show is any better than the night he transformed a Greenwich Village sushi restaurant into an all out sing-a-long, which included restaurant patrons and staff joining him in an impromptu piano playing set (there happened to be an upright piano against the wall next to our table that was calling his name) highlighted by his fun-filled rendition of Lionel Richie’s “All Night Long”.  Is it possible?!?!?!?!  Check out this exclusive Westcheddar interview with Mike to find out more about the show, his roots in magic and music, and if he actually has A.D.D….

ip:  Ok Michael, my dude, we go way back.  I vividly remember you stumping me with amazing card tricks when I first met you in Mr. Hazelton’s 9th grade biology class.  Tell me where your interest in magic started and how old you were when you got into making us mere mortals feel like total mush heads.

 mf:  Mr.Hazelton. Wow. I think I learned most of my first card tricks during his class. It was only a year earlier that I started studying magic seriously.  Eighth grade was when, as we say in the business, the bug bit.  I saw a magician perform close up magic while I was away on vacation in Florida.  He made some coins appear out of thin air, changed a one dollar bill into a hundred right in front of my face…some cool stuff.  Once I got home, I went to White Plains public library, and I took out and read every book it had on magic. That is to say, well, both of them.  And from there, I never stopped. As you know I played basketball freshman year, since you and I road to practice and the bench together…but after that, I started practicing magic for a few hours a day every day after school.  That’s how it started.

ip:  You appeared quite regularly on our cult classic public access television show Prime Time with Dan and Andrew back in high school, pulling cards out of your mouth and other areas of your body.  Did you put on any other magic performances back in those days?

mf:  Sure….many.  Some casual, some formal. I remember doing a First Holy Communion for an Italian Family.  It was great.  I was like 15 years old and at the end of the party the father pulled me over and shoved three hundred-dollar bills into my hand.  I performed at a few bar mitzvah’s, office parties, and even a few sleight of hand competitions…not to mention for friends and family all the time. But Prime Time was a great experience and a ton of fun.  I especially enjoyed watching Dave Epstein beat himself senseless just to get on the show.  As an artist, I think you have to respect that kind of dedication. 

ip:  I also recall a fine performance our senior year as the lead in The Music Man.  What made you want to get into that musical world so late in your high school days?

mf:  Well, it was more accidental than deliberate.  I’d pretty much given up on sports after dislocating my shoulder for the one hundred and twelth time, and I started to get into performing with all of the magic.  I played guitar and piano as a kid and always loved music, but never dreamed of performing in front of an audience.  But the spring musical our senior year turned out to be the Music Man, and I started hearing rumors that Mike Backes, who the show was basically picked for, was not planning to audition in order to pursue other interests.  So, there was this BIG void.  If not Mike Backes, then who?  So, I bought the movie of The Music Man, and studied it for weeks and weeks before the auditions so that by the time it was time to audition, I already knew the part cold.  It was, and is to this day, one of the hardest periods of work I’ve ever put in.  It also reinforced my love of performance and mimicry.

 ip:  At Tufts, you joined a pretty popular acapella singing group.  Tell us about that.  Do acapella singers bag a lot of chicks?

mf:  Do a cappella singers bag a lot of chicks?  My guess is it’s bell-curve distributed, but I really don’t know.  I sang in a coed group called the Tufts Amalgamates.  We were very ambitious with our music. Tufts has great a cappella, and the all mens group, the Beelzebubs, is one of the better known groups in the country.  I didn’t want to be in an all mens group for some reason…it seemed like a lot of fun, and those guys probably did get laid a lot, but it just wasn’t the experience i was looking for.  There was something fun about being in the Amalgamates–a great challenge.  It’s very hard to sing a cappella in general, but mixed groups, I think, are even tougher, so to make it sound good requires a lot of work and dedication.  And the people I sang with were really, really fantastic.  Some of the most talented people I’ve ever met.  Did you know that Jessica Beil auditioned for my group while I was abroad my junior year?  Well, she did, and she didn’t get in.  When I learned of this, I went into a deep, prolonged period of depression that didn’t end until…gosh, did it end? No, actually. That knowledge still haunts me to this day. Then last year there was that book, Perfect Pitch: The Quest for Collegiate a Cappella Glory that shed a lot of light on the subculture, and also highlighted some bigtime celebrities that sang in college, inclduing Masi Oka from the show Heroes, and Anne Hathaway, among others. College a cappella is becoming something of a springboard.  In fact, I now sing in a group called Duwende. You’d never know it’s a cappella. It’s just good, solid music.

ip:  Wow, Jessica Beil huh?  They really blew it on that one.  Anyway, you’ve recently transitioned from the business world back into the arts and performance arena.  What compelled you to do that?  I’m sure it wasn’t about the money.

mf:  No, it was not at all about the money.  Here’s how I look at it.  There’s something called the Ten Thousand Hour Rule.  If you’ve read Malcolm Gladwell’s new book, Outliers, then you’ve heard of it.  It’s basically this; in order to become an expert at something, one of two things is required.  Either ten years, or ten thousand hours of practice.  So, when I graduated from business school last december, I started thinking, man, what am I willing to devote ten thousand hours of practice to?  And I realized, maybe things would be easier if I just focused on something that I’d ALREADY put ten thousand hours into, and then some!  That was magic and music.

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ip:  So you sold out your first round of your new show, “A.D.D. Lightful”.  First of all, fun name for the show, but why the reference to A.D.D.?  Do you suffer from the symptoms of the disorder?

mf:  I’m sorry, what was the question? Oh right, ADD.  Yeah, I think I do have ADD, though I like to think I thrive on it rather than suffer from it.  I’ve pursued lots of different things in my life…not just magic and music, but real estate, investments of all kinds, worked at a newspaper, studied philosophy in college, went to business school, considered becoming a psychologist, a rabbi, and more.  I’ve never really found something to focus on day after day, year after year.  So ADD just seemed like a natural description of my life, so I wrote a show about my life and experiences, all woven together with magic.

ip:  What should we expect from the show?  It sounds like it’s a mixture of all the things you’re interested in, like magic and music.  Anything else?

mf:  Yeah–music is really a small component…I don’t even do something musical in every show.  But there’s definitely more to it.  A major portion is devoted to card cheating technique, where I do a small expose session, teaching the audience about real cheating techniques and then demostrating what they look like.  I also talk about memory, because as you know I was on a memory infomercial.  Then I talk about cognotive philosophy/psychology, which was my college major…and more.  I don’t want to give away too much:)

ip:  What was it like putting the show together?  You’re basically a one man band, right?

mf:  I enjoyed putting the show together.  Business is fun, but having primarily worked in investments, I was always doing analytical work.  The show was a chance to be creative, and i really loved every minute of the process. It showed me that being creative is necessary for me to be happy. 

ip:  Our chemistry teacher in 10th grade, the legendary Mr. Doherty, used to call you “Copperfield”, which never got old by the way.  Out of all these new crazy magic dudes out there like David Blaine and Criss Angel, who’s the nicest?  And what’s the craziest magic trick you’ve ever seen someone do?

mf:  Wow.  Great question. I knew David Blaine and Criss Angel back in high school.  Had I known then that they were going to be famous, maybe I would have kept in better touch…though I doubt it. I’m happy for those guys.  Who’s the nicest magician…tough to say.  Some of my closest friends are magicians….lots of fascinating, great guys.  My friend Ryan Oakes is a great magician and a great guy. And a former a cappella singer himself! Best trick…actually, the trick that fried me the most in recent years was done by Ryan one night while we were hanging out at a bar in the city.  He asked me if I had a quarter.  I did.  He took out a Sharpie and asked me to initial both sides of the quarter.  Then he ordered a diet coke, which came in an unopened can.  The place served all sodas from cans, if you’re wondering.  Then, he took the quarter in one hand and the can in he other, and he slapped the coin onto the side of the can…and instantly, it was gone.  His hands were empy, and when he shook the can, i could hear something rattling inside. He popped open the can, slowly poured out the soda, and as the last drops poured out, I could see something lodged in the mouth of the can.  We had to cut open the can in order to get out the coin…my quarter, with my initials on it.

ip:  Sick.  So what’s next for Michael Friedland.  We know the show is coming up in a couple weeks, but beyond that, what’s next?

mf:  I wish I knew.  Hopefully more performances.  I’m planning to start a business on the side, but in this economy…it’s anyone’s guess.  My goal is to keep performing, keep improving, and hopefully start doing some lecturing here and there.  That’s the dream anyway.

For more info on A.D.D. LIGHTFUL, click the link to Mike’s website…

www.mhfmagic.com

and to order tickets for his Feb. 5-7th shows at Under St. Marks in Manhattan, click here…

tickets for A.D.D. LIGHTFUL

Grassroots Grind

Interviews, My Dudes, Stan Ipcus, Youth

Jonathan Joseph, the 30 year old tenured Social Studies stud teacher at White Plains High School, is one of the reasons why Barack Obama will be sworn in as our next President this Tuesday.  As an early Obama supporter with major political interests (he watches Jon Stewart and Stephen Colbert’s shows religiously), Joseph spent much of his weekend and vacation time off from teaching in 2008 volunteering with the campaign.  From traveling to nearby swing states to making cold calls, even going door to door at times, the man with two first names did whatever it took to get his candidate elected.  And it worked.  My good buddy Double J took the time to talk with Westcheddar about his efforts on both the campaign trail and in the classroom…

ip:  For those out there that don’t know you, what classes do you teach at White Plains High School?  Which one is your favorite?

jj: I’ve been at the high school for 7 years now and have taught a variety of different stuff including U.S. History, Economics, and Law.  From a content perspective, I like Economics the most – you can basically turn anything into an economic problem.  The discussions are the most real and seniors are the most fun to teach.  But U.S. History is probably my favorite simply because it’s a full year and you develop cool relationships with kids over that time.   

ip:  Were your students interested in the election?  Did they talk about it a lot with you?  Did you use class time to talk to them about it? 

jj:  They were aware of it and some were more interested than others.  I saw some kids show up at the call center in Rye before the election.  Obviously the feeling in the building was very pro-Obama (he won the school vote 1300-250 or so), but I’m not sure how well they know the issues so I try to focus on that angle.   

I definitely use class time to discuss it, I mean, what better time to be teaching this stuff.  It’s nice when something that’s usually dry like the Electoral College can be engaging.  Also, if they’re interested in politics and government because of him, it would be a waste not to take advantage of it.  It’s cool how it all works out too.  On Friday, I was teaching about the post-Civil War South, about sharecropping and black codes and Jim Crow.  On Tuesday, an African-American will take the Oath of Office.    

ip:  You spent the last three weekends campaigning in Pennsylvania before the election, a neighboring swing state.  What did your work there consist of?  Were you affiliated with a larger group Obama supporters? 

jj:  I started spending time in Pennsylvania last winter in preparation for the Democratic primary in April.  Initially, I just found an address in Northwest Philly and took the Chinatown bus down there to see how I could help.  As a teacher you get a good amount of time off, so I spent a good part of my February and April breaks there.  When the general election rolled around, I found out my cousin was organizing trips out of Brooklyn, so I would hop on random vans and go down on weekends to work.  I also made calls from my house and helped train others at local call centers in Westchester.

This is gonna get a little bit into the nuts and bolts of it all, but the way it was organized was incredible.  Basically, they had print-outs of registered voters with a ton of info.  Everything from the person’s address to party affiliation to the number of people who lived in the house, along with their family members names, ages, party affiliation etc.  Our job was to find out how they felt about Obama and compile a database that could be used to create separate strategy for each individual on the list.  Some people needed to be persuaded, others just needed voting information.  On election day, the ground teams in Philly were working with call teams in New York to get to every Obama voter in a swing state.  Only those people who were Obama supporters were contacted and brought to the polls. As the day went on, the lists were refined to reflect who had already voted.  Those who hadn’t got another phone call or door knock.  If you were a McCain supporter or on the fence, we knew it and would just skip your house.   

The hardest part was that we were in the most run-down, poor areas of Philly.  I’m a big believer that politics can and does make a difference, but it was difficult to figure out how to explain that to families who had basically been forgotten by every politician who had ever knocked on their door.  For as much as it felt like I was doing something valuable and worthwhile, it also felt like a bunch of white, anti-war, pro-environment, children of hippy liberals running through a neighborhood that we didn’t belong in and preaching at people whose struggle we didn’t necessarily understand and couldn’t relate to.  It’s complicated, I guess. 

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ip:  What was it about Barack Obama that initially caught your attention?  Can you remember back to when you first heard of him? 

jj:  I’m a political nerd so I was up on Obama early in 2004.  The guy he ran against had to withdraw because of scandal and so his seat was one that could be picked up by the Democrats, a rare thing back then.  When he gave the keynote at the Democratic Convention, I remember knowing that he was a great speaker and that I didn’t want to miss it.  The thing I like most about him is that he honestly doesn’t believe that those who disagree with him are bad people.  I think he looks for that which we have in common, and I think he will step away from the politics of judgment.  The coolest thing I’ve heard him say since he got elected was that he wanted to bring the two halves of Washington D.C. together, because currently, once you step away from all the white marble, you find a lot of those forgotten neighborhoods like the ones I canvassed in Philly.  It’s an issue where there are no political points to be scored, so for him to even mention that… it gives me hope that we have someone genuine in the White House.   

ip:  Have you read his books?  Which one would you recommend to your students? 

jj:  He’s a great writer.  Dreams of My Father is the better book.  It’s more about him and less about policy positions and politics.  You realize that he came from the same place the rest of us did, and that he fought the same battles with himself that we all do.  

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ip: Just curious, this is a little off topic, but who is the most “off the hook” student you ever had in a class at WPHS?  Is there one that sticks out as being really funny or having a crazy personality or being a total class clown? 

jj: First of all, all kids are off the hook. The shit they say is hilarious… and I spend a huge amount of time everyday laughing.  It’s one of the biggest benefits of the job.  But since we’re on the Obama social activism train, I’ll shout out a kid named Arturo Bravo.  As a senior in 2005, he organized a walk out in support of immigrants.  When word got to the administration, they called him into an office with the police chief and the principal and every other big willy they could find.  They tried to pressure him into calling the whole thing off, hitting him with everything from personal consequences to issues of student safety.  He looked them dead in the eye and said, “I understand, but this is something I have to do.”  In the end, 1000 kids walked out and held a rally at the fountain downtown.  The police were cool about it too.  The commish was so impressed by Arturo that he made sure that all the cops who covered the rally were in their dress whites.  I think he’s studying to be a lawyer now.       

ip:  Yeah, I remember that.  I know Arturo too, he’s a cool kid.  From a teacher’s perspective, what do you see as the main issues that are affecting young people in this country that Obama needs to address immediately? 

jj:  I hope he can help make schools into places where creativity and innovation are welcome and rewarded.  We’re all caught up in this test score or that test score or how many AP kids we have.  The tests don’t require critical thinking, and they make schools into these rigid, inflexible places where success is based on understanding and working the system.  It’s nonsense.  Ideally, we’d have a society where the most talented people said, “I want to be a teacher.”  We need to make schools into places where those people would want to work, and where their talents wouldn’t be wasted.  So any step in that direction would be nice.  And is it too much to ask that college be affordable?  

ip:  Do you see kids at school wearing Obama t-shirts?  It seems to be a new fashion trend. 

jj:  There are some around but nothing too crazy, I’m sure it will pick up even more after he takes office.  More of them seem to be hoping Ed Hardy gets elected in 2012.  

ip:  Ha!  You’re a well known sneakerhead at WPHS.  What’s the sickest pair you own?  And if you had to design an Obama sneaker for Nike, what would the design and colors look like? 

jj:  My favorites right now are these green denim Dunks.  The De La Soul’s are sick though too.  And I’m the only cat in the world with a pair of Air Force Ips.  I actually went to the website to design Obama Dunks, but it wouldn’t let me cut and paste the picture.  Obviously red, white and blue, but the way I had the colors was kinda sick.  Throw the Obama logo on the back outside heel and we’re good to go… Air Force Hopes.

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ip:  I found a pair of Obamas that someone made online.  Check them out.  Finally, how did you celebrate Obama’s win?  Keep it real, did you cry when you found out?  It’s okay, lots of people did.   

jj:  Cats came over early, but when they called it for Obama I was sitting on my couch with my friend Kate.  And hell yeah I cried.  Most of the next day too.  It was an incredible day to be a teacher.  And I’ll probably be crying again when I’m standing on the Mall in Washington on Tuesday when he takes office.  I worked hard for this, and wanted it badly.  It’s that line from Shawshank, in the letter at the end from Andy… “Remember Red, hope is a good thing, maybe the best of things, and no good thing ever dies…”  Holler.

Mr. Joseph’s Top 5 Obama Campaign Moments

1. National Anthem- Election Night on St. Marks in NYC

 

2. Manassas, Va

3. Responding to Hillary’s negative attacks in the debate the night before.

4. The South Carolina Victory Speech.  Probably my favorite of the campaign.

5. Super Tuesday Speech from Chicago – “We are the ones we’ve been waiting for.”

Thanks to JJ for the exclusive interview.  And to all the ladies out there who want to holler at him down in D.C. after the inauguration, well, you may have to wait in line…

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P.S.  I just realized this is my 100th Westcheddar post.  Nice.  Thanks to all my readers for their continued support.  Stay tuned for more fresh updates in 2009.   Peace.

Comedy Central

Interviews, My Dudes

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I became friends with comedian Nick Kroll back in high school through my buddy Andrew Goldberg.  He was always a hilarious kid, cracking jokes and living it up.  Currently, his voice can be heard co-starring in the new HBO animated series The Life and Times of Tim (which he also writes for), and you might have seen him making witty remarks about your favorite celebrities on Best Week Ever.  But that’s not all Nick’s got going for him.  He’s working on a new animated project, and continues to develop his stand-up act and various live stage and web shows, which include all sorts of crazy characters (see pic above LOL).  Check out this exclusive Westcheddar interview with Rye, New York’s own comedy sensation…

IP: So Nick, you looked alot like McLovin from Superbad back in high school, you know, a skinny kid with glasses.  Any similarities to him other than the striking resemblance?  Ever hang out with cops or bang chicks at parties back in the day?  Did you have a fake ID?

NK: Its so funny to think that I looked like McLovin growing up. I had no idea that’s what I looked like. I had a very different sense of how the world saw me.  I hung out with cops when I was six when I took a self defense karate class with a bunch of Rye cops.  They would break cinderblocks with their head and I would rush to the bathroom to unsuccessfully take my karate pants off before having some good ol’ kid diarrhea.  I did have a fake ID, it was my brothers and said I was 25. The fact that it ever worked still amazes me.

IP:  My bad dude.  I didn’t mean the McLovin comparison as a diss.  You were the man back in the day.  Very handsome…

NK: I appreciate it.  I know who I was and what I am…Luke Perry from Beverly Hills 90210!!

IP: Ha!  You were in an improv group at Georgetown University.  Tell us about that.  Your shows used to be packed when I would come see you perform.

NK: Being in G-PIG (Georgetown Players Improv Group) was the best thing I got out of college. I had never done sketch or improv comedy before and it opened my eyes to the possibility of saying whatever I wanted however I wanted.  It definitely gave me the confidence and experience to pursue a career in comedy. I also met a bunch of people I’m still close friends with and regularly collaborate with: Mike Birbiglia, John Mulaney, Ed Herro, Brian Donovan, Jacqueline Novak, Conrad Mulcahy, Alison Becker and a few others.  I only mention their names so it will come up in their google alerts and they’ll be mildly happy that I name checked them.  They’re all doing quite well in the biz of show and it’s amazing that we all used to sit in classrooms, rehearsing ridiculous scenes for no one’s amusement but ourselves.

IP: The first time I ever saw you on TV was in a commercial for American Express where you played Andy Roddick’s  “mojo”, and then shortly after that you were in a very well known Verizon commercial.  How did you get those gigs?

NK: I auditioned for these and all other commercials I’ve had the genuine pleasure of being in.  The AMEX campaign was an amazing experience because it was the first time that I was a part of something quite big in scale.  They closed down blocks on Park Ave and the Brooklyn Bridge to film sequences.  And then Roddick lost in the first round. It was an amazingly bizarre turn of events. The Verizon commercial was super cool because we flew down to Argentina to shoot it. Got to hang out with the Verizon guy and see that he was an actual human being.

IP: How often were you recognized on the street during the time those commercials aired?  I mean, they were on all the time.

NK: I’m almost never recognized on the street for anything I’ve done over the years. Mojo for sure, because they dyed my hair blonde and i was wearing a cowboy hat.

IP: Were you in any other commercials I might not have seen?

NK: I did a few other fun spots along the way.  A really fun one was with Anderson Cooper for CNN.com. I think its on youtube somewhere.  He was very pleasant, good comedic timing and very cool to me even though I was a little green when I shot it. There’s a fun FEDEX spot out there too. I got to play a guy named Barry which has always been a dream.

IP: Being on Best Week Ever must be fun, popping wisecracks at the expense of the rich and famous.  Any one in particular you really enjoy making fun of?

NK: I don’t really enjoy making fun of people who are famous because of something impressive they’ve done, like being quality actors or athletes.  I much prefer making fun of people who are famous for the sake of being famous like people who lack discernible skills like reality show personalities or president elect Obama.

IP: Ha!  OK, describe your personal dream Best Week Ever.  What would you do?

NK: Eat fried chicken all day, every day.

IP: That Cavemen show you were in was off the air before I ever even got to see it.  Was it any good?

NK: I thought Cavemen had some very funny moments.  It was an experiment that had its ups and downs but I think for the people who actually watched the show, it provided some good, quality laughs.  We shot 12 epsiodes and they aired 6 or 7 of them. They definitely got better as the show progressed. It was my first job in TV and I felt lucky to have it. The makeup took four hours every morning so I was not unhappy that it didn’t last 6 seasons.

IP: You’ve done some straight stand up comedy in your day.  How does that compare to your other comedic work?

NK: I honestly love it all. The character stuff, sketch, videos.  I fucking love comedy.  I’ve been doing more and more standup recently, crafting an act, tweaking, adding bits, taking stuff out.  I’m finding a lot of joy in making small changes.  It’s like writing a song or a poem, you wanna get that shit to its essence.

IP: Ever bombed horribly?

NK: Bombed many a time.  Makes you stronger.  Never fun, though.

IP: You’re a voice actor on the new HBO animated series The Life and Times of Tim.  I caught an episode of it last week, it was pretty funny.  Your character is kind of a dork on the show though, what’s up with that?

NK: Its a blast. I encourage you to go back and watch the show on demand or whatevs. I play Stu and he’s a little less attractive than me both physically and emotionally.  I try to love and simultaneously despise all the characters I play. The response from people about the show has been really, really awesome.

IP:  Maybe dork isn’t the right adjective for Stu.  I gotta check out some more episodes.  Glad it’s getting a good response.  I’ve heard a few friends talking it up recently.  Anyway, you write for the show too, right?  How did that all come about?

NK: The show has a strong improvisational side and I found that myself and Steve Dildarian, the super funny gent who created the show, got a long quite well comedically.  Steve was nice enough to ask me to come in a bunch of times to help come up with episode ideas.  One in particular is where my character Stu, Tim and Marie the HR lady have a terrible threesome.  Classy stuff.

IP:  Do you like doing just the voice stuff or is this just another stepping stone towards a bigger goal?  What’s your dream gig?  Your own show?  Movie roles?  A writer behind the scenes?

NK: I want to do it all. Write, act, maybe direct. Im really enjoying animation right now.  I’m also voicing a character on a FOX show coming out in April called Sit Down, Shut Up, created by Mitch Hurwitz who also created Arrested Development. Josh Weinstein, who ran The Simpsons for many years, is running the show and the cast is ridiculous: Jason Bateman, WIll Arnett, Cheri Oteri, Keenan Thompson, Will Forte, Tom Kenney, Henry Winkler.  It’s so much fucking fun.

IP:  Sounds sick.  You once played a Scandinavian Meth addict at one of my rap concerts at Joe’s Pub, doing bits in the opening of the show and in between sets.  What was his name again?

NK: Ah yes, Yorgen Burnsen. Haven’t done him in quite some time. He was the fifth member of Ace of Base who was kicked out for being addicted to Meth.  A real class act.

IP: You should bring him back out.  As I recall he was a crowd favorite.  What else do you have cooking right now with your comedic career?

NK: My friend Rob Corddry (watch out google alerts: Rob Corddry!!) wrote, directed, and stars in a hilarious web series called Children’s Hospital which is a parody of Grey’s Anatomy and all those shows. I play a 6 year old with aging disease.  That series is gonna be hilarious.

IP: You’re living in L.A. now right?  What do you miss most about New York?

NK: I miss so much about NYC. Mainly my family and friends who are all basically here. I miss classy NYC ladies.  They are as beautiful as actresses or models but they’re teachers or social workers or artists. Getting a bone just thinking about them.

IP: How are the women in L.A. treating you?  Do comedians have groupies?

NK: We dont really have groupies and i’m just fine with that.

THANKS NICK!!!!  HERE’S A COUPLE BONUS CLIPS…

Nick Kroll “Drunk Packing”

OH HELLO SHOW GIL AND GEORGE VISIT MONA- CLICK TO WATCH

Keep your eyes glued to the boob tube for Nick Kroll, and if you missed it, check out his buddy Andrew Goldberg’s interview with Westcheddar here…

Digging for Dirt

Events, Interviews

It’s been four years since Old Dirty Bastard’s death, and hip hop hasn’t been the same since.  It’s so clean!  Everyone wants to be fresh!  I miss the days when rap dudes were out of their minds and DIRTY, like ODB.  He certainly wasn’t the best rapper lyrically in the Wu-Tang Clan, but his style was the craziest.  And he was quite a character too.  In a new book titled Digging for Dirt, author Jaime Lowe, a writer for such popular publications as The VIllage Voice and Sports Illustrated, uncovered the mysteries surrounding his life to find out who exactly was the man behind the myth.  A native Californian now living in Brooklyn, Lowe recently rapped with Westcheddar about some of the dirt she dug up on ODB…

IP: So, a book on Old Dirty Bastard.  Can’t wait to read it.  I imagine there’s a lot of crazy content in it.  He was a pretty wild guy on and off the mic, huh?

JL: He was, he was the wild card of the bunch. I don’t think anyone could ever predict what was gonna happen with him. 

IP: You’ve done some magazine writing in the past, and some stuff with The Village Voice.  How did you make the leap into getting the deal and the rights to put together this book?

JL: Surprisingly, you don’t need the rights to write a book, just enough access to tell the story. I had talked with some of his family and Wu-Tang for an article for the Voice and for the most part they were really helpful with the book as well. And when there’s more room and more pages to fill that obviously opens up the possibility for conducting interviews with as many people as possible. The deal came through in a way that was seriously magical at least from my perspective. I sent the article to an agent after a couple years had passed after his death and asked if he thought it could be a book. He did. We worked on the proposal and he sold it. 

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IP: On the Macmillan Books website, the book is described as “a fan’s exploration”.  Were you always a big ODB and Wu Tang fan?  Did you know him personally?

JL: You know, there are definitely bigger fans out there. I love ODB and Wu-Tang but some of the people I met along the way could definitely out reference me. I didn’t know ODB personally, I interviewed him several times for the Voice article and grew really fond of him. And he was definitely not in a great state, but somehow I felt like there was a charming, smart, thoughtful person in front of me which are definitely not the things you’d immediately think of when thinking of ODB.

IP: Do you have a favorite ODB song?

JL: I mean it’s hard to have a favorite, I have an irrational reaction everytime I hear his voice. But I’d have to go with “Shimmy Shimmy Ya”, but I also love his song with RZA, “Cuttin’ Headz”. 

IP: How about your favorite Wu Tang album, group or solo?  It’s a common debate in real hip hop head circles.  Mine is Raekwon’s Only Built for Cuban Linx, though I have a few others that are right up there with it.

JL: I know that I’m biased and this is definitely not my favorite my album because I think it’s a great hip hop album, but Nigga Please is a kaleidoscopic display of showmanship, erratic temperament, hot flash moods, insanity, rants, and evidence of the beginnings of a total meltdown. It’s a piece of work that reflects who the artist is in the moment of creation and really it’s a raw reflection of madness. I think it’s one of the most honest recordings and kind of terrifying. Plus some great tracks.

Odb - nigga please.jpg

IP: You grew up in California.  Did alot of people out there listen to east coast rap coming up?  I moved to New York from Oakland when I was 5 and I always wonder if I would’ve been as into the east coast hip hop scene if I never moved.

JL: Wu-Tang definitely translated to West Coast. It didn’t seem so steeped in geography and turf as Biggie or Tupac or Dre. Those guys used their neighborhoods as their identities. Wu-Tang really transcended Staten Island. I mean it was  a crucial part of their identity but it’s as if the Wu-Tang sound and vibe existed in its own universe and one that was accessible by all. It’s why I think Wu-Tang has such huge cross over appeal. 

IP: What other artists do you like?  Is there another band, rapper, or musician out there that interests you enough to write a book on them some day?

JL: I don’t think any musician or artist could follow ODB. 

IP: How was it gathering information for the book?  Did you interview alot of the Wu-Tang members?  Who was the most interesting to talk to?

JL: I didn’t interview too many Wu-Tang members. I really wanted the focus to be on ODB and really they’re pretty exhausting to track down for interviews.  I talked to GZA pretty extensively and he was insanely helpful. I talked to RZA for the article and he was very thoughtful and emotional about ODB as well. 

IP: They called him Old Dirty Bastard because there was “no father to his style”.  Did he have a relationship with his real father as a kid?

JL: He did. He grew up with two working parents in Fort Greene. His Dad used to take him fishing in Long Island. His parents certainly went their separate ways and he was primarily raised by his mom Cherry Jones.

IP: His police reports and crime sheet must be insane to look at.  Did you see any first hand for your research? 

JL: I did and they are.  The thing that’ s most striking is how much petty theft and drugs related charges were on them.  But don’t fooled by Wu-Tang paranoia, the FBI really does have a file on them that you can access under the Freedom of Information Act. And it certainly includes a thick folder on ODB.

IP: How many kids did he really father?  More than ten?

JL: I’d say more than ten is possible, 13 is rumored to be the number but I’ve only known concretely about 7 from four moms. 

IP: Wow.  And he was on welfare right?  I remember seeing him on MTV going around to collect welfare checks?  How does someone with a major record deal manage to do that?  I don’t understand, was he really not making that much money as a rapper?  I know there was a lot of Wu Tang members getting there piece of the pie, but he did release solo albums too.

JL: When he was at the Welfare office for MTV, he happened to still be on file from before Wu-Tang hit. He and his wife Icelene  were on welfare in the early nineties but they hadn’t collected a check in years. But he figured if it was there and already issued to him, he may as well keep it. That whole controversy was pretty much a demonstration of government records that hadn’t been updated—bureaucracy at work. But obviously, it was blown out of proportion and was amazing PR for his album.

IP: How’s Brooklyn treating you?  Do you like living there?  He was originally from there too, correct?  Close to where you are living now?

JL: Not to far, he was probably a few miles away in Fort Greene. I love Brooklyn.

IP: You’re holding an event to celebrate the release of the book in BK at Gleason’s Gym on December 6th.  Sounds exciting.  Will you be reading parts of the book?  Are you expecting any special guests?  What’s the scoop?

JL: I will not be reading, but I’m reading at Pacific Standard on Dec. 3. There will be special guests, DJ Blue on the decks (and he actually wrote the movie State Property which ODB was in) and perhaps some surprises. I’m hoping it will be a raucous dance party.  I’m also hoping to raise some money for Impact House a rehab facility that ODB was in out in California. 

IP: Oh yeah, he was in State Property.  And ODB was signed to Rocafella Records when he died also.  Did he have a close relationship with Jay-Z?  How about Biggie Smalls?  I’ve seen video of him and Big on stage rapping together back in the day.

JL: I don’t think he had a close relationship with Jay-Z. He definitely came up with Biggie and so they performed together at talent shows in high school and certainly knew each other.

IP: So what’s next for you?  Any more hip hop related writing?  New book deals on the table?  Or are you focused for now on this release.

JL: Focusing on this for now and cooking up something , I don’t know what specifically though! Suggestions welcome…!

The Guy Behind the Family Guy

Interviews, My Dudes, The Good Old Days

Well, he’s not exactly Seth McFarlane, the creator of the popular animated sitcom Family Guy, but Andrew Goldberg (pictured above) used to work for McFarlane as an assistant and is now one of the staff writers on the show.  Not a bad gig for a guy who used to co-host a public access sketch comedy TV show in high school (I was his co-host if you can believe it).  Goldberg recently took a break from cracking jokes all day at his job to crack some with us and discuss what it’s like to be a writer on one of the most popular shows on television.  And he also shares his Top 5 Family Guy clips.   Check it out…

IP:  So Andrew, let’s start at the beginning.  Do you remember the first time you made someone laugh?

AG:  When I was young, I was always the class clown, to the point where my school made my parents get me tested in the second grade to see if I could be clinically classified as a specific type of pain in the ass.  If I’d been born a few years later or had lazier parents or teachers, I probably would have been stuffed with Ritalin, but fortunately they specialized my class schedule instead.  Like instead of sending me to the classes where I was most disruptive, they’d have me write short stories on my own, which was great.  I remember writing one about a guy who kidnapped Ann B. Davis (Alice from “The Brady Bunch”) to impress this girl he liked, but then he ended up falling in love with Ann B. Davis.

IP:  I heard the R and B sensation Ne-Yo say in a recent interview that the key to getting girls is having a good sense of humor?  Is that true?

AG:  I hear that a lot, but I think most of the girls I’ve “gotten” were mainly attracted to my enormous penis.

IP:  Ok, how does one become a staff writer on Family Guy?  Hard work?  Extraordinary talent?  Sexual favors?

AG:  A combination of the three.  And good timing is also important.  I first started working as the creator Seth MacFarlane’s assistant shortly after Family Guy came back from being canceled, and a lot of magazines were wanting to do “interviews” with Peter or Stewie or one of the other Family Guy characters.  This was “free work” and the writer who had been doing it was eager to let me help him out, and eventually I started writing almost all of them.  This was great, because it meant my boss and the other executive producers were reading my writing on a regular basis and seeing that I could write Family Guy jokes.  This led to me writing two freelance  episodes and a book for Family Guy while I was still an assistant.  And by doing a good job with those, I eventually got promoted.

IP:  What’s a day in the work life of a writer?  Are you holed up in an office throwing balled up papers filled with bad ideas on them into a garbage pale?

AG:  Being a TV writer, and especially a sitcom writer, is a lot of fun.  Most days you’re working in a room with anywhere from three to ten other writers, sitting around, making each other laugh.  It’s really great, and I actually miss it when I’m at home, alone, working on a script.  And a nice thing about working for an animated show is you often get to do a different thing every day.  Like yesterday, we did a rewrite on a show that had just been table read, which means that it’s early on in the production process, and they haven’t even recorded the dialogue or started animating it.  Today we’re working on figuring out a new story which hasn’t even been written yet.  And tomorrow we have a color rough cut screening and rewrite for a show that will air in the spring.

IP:  Tell us about the first episode you ever wrote for Family Guy, “Believe it or Not, Joe’s Walking on Air”.  What was it all about?  How cool was it to be see it all come together and be credited on TV?

AG:  Well, one of Peter’s friend’s, Joe, is a quadriplegic, and in that episode, he gets a leg transplant and is able to walk again.  He gets cocky, turns into an asshole, and dumps the guys for a cooler crew of friends, so they decide to re-cripple him.  It was very exciting and nerve-wracking to see it on TV.  We had a bunch of friends over, and every time everyone laughed at a joke I felt great, and every time a joke didn’t land I felt like I was gonna barf.

IP:  How are you involved as a writer in the animation process for the show?  I mean, I’ve seen you draw, and it’s not pretty.

AG:  No, I’m a terrible artist, but when it’s your episode, you participate in the storyboard launch, which is the meeting where the writers meet with the artists to answer their questions about the script, and you give notes on the storyboard.  Usually the notes from the writers are going to be about how a gag is staged or a character’s design more than the art.  Seth MacFarlane, though, began his career as an artist, so he’s very involved in overseeing the animation end.  And I’ve also been helping edit episodes for syndication, so I’ve learned some about animation editing and sound editing.

IP:  You have a new episode airing soon too that you wrote for this season.  Give us a preview.

AG:  Yeah, my next episode will air in February.  In it, Peter finds a winning raffle ticket from 1987 in his junk drawer for a round of golf with O.J. Simpson.  He cashes it in and become friends with O.J.  Fortunately for me, O.J. will probably be in prison when it airs.

IP:  Who’s your favorite character on Family Guy?  You wrote a book about Brian (the dog), “Brian Griffin’s Guide to Booze, Broads, and the Lost Art of Being a Man”.  Is he your pick?

AG:  I love to watch Stewie, because he’s such a little dick, and Seth’s voice acting is so funny and nuanced with him.  But I love to write for Peter, because he’s such an idiot and a lunatic, he can pretty much do anything at any given moment and it’ll still be in-character for him.

Book Cover

IP:  Ok, top 5 TV shows of all time.  Give them to us.

AG:  Seinfeld, Cheers, the first three or four seasons of “The West Wing,” 1990s Simpsons, and more recently the first season of “Friday Night Lights.”  Clear eyes, full hearts can’t lose.

IP:  If you had the opportunity to write for another show that’s on the air right now, what would it be?

AG:  I honestly have my dream job.  I actually have a fax that I sent my then-agent about five years ago, which was an article about Family Guy possibly being resurrected on which I scribbled “I’d give my left nut to work on this show,” and it’s stuck on my bulletin board.  But if I didn’t work hear, I think it’d be fun to work on “The Office” or “30 Rock.”

IP:  That writer’s strike was pretty long and brutal.  What was the wittiest picket sign you saw out there in the trenches?  Someone must have written something creative with all that time to think.

AG:  Yeah, it was an experience.  I actually got some of the artists here to draw a few picket signs for me.  My favorite had Brian with a picket sign sneaking a drink out of a flask on one side, and Stewie on the other side holding a sign that said “We’re here, we’re queer, get used to it.”

IP:  How did you pass the day during the strike besides picketing and whining?  Did you have anything else you were developing besides Family Guy?

AG:  Well, at the time, I was working on “Seth MacFarlane’s Cavalcade of Cartoon Comedy,” a series of on-line shorts that my boss produced for Google.  The production company had made a tentative deal with the writers guild, like the one that David Letterman’s company made, so we were allowed to continue writing.  Otherwise, I spent a lot of time on the picket lines, and I was the strike captain for “Family Guy” and “American Dad.”  It was actually one of the busiest and most exhausting times of my life.

IP:  You’re a New York writer that now lives in L.A.  Is your life more like Hank Moody from Californication or Larry David from Curb Your Enthusiasm?

AG:  I don’t watch Californication, but based on what I know about it and my hairline, I’m gonna go with Larry David.

IP:  What do you miss most about life in New York?  The pizza?  The bagels?

AG:  I love living in LA, but I definitely miss New York.  Definitely miss the pizza and the bagels, and the bodegas, and not needing a car, and the energy of the city, and there are about 15 perfect days in New York, usually in like April or May, or September or October, that are just incredible, where there’s something in the air, which are somehow better than any perfect day in LA.  Oh, and I miss you.  And my parents.  And Francesco’s on Mamaroneck Ave.

IP:  I miss you too, like, alot.  Ok, I’ve got to ask.  You and I, for those who don’t know, had a sketch comedy slash talk show back in high school called Prime Time with Dan and Andrew (see pic above of Goldberg back in the day).  What were your fondest memories from the show?  Any favorite sketches or moments?

AG:  We had a lot of very fun times.  I remember a sketch we did where you and Meghan O’Rourke played Jeffrey Dahmer’s parents and me not being able to stop laughing.  “Name That STD” was of course a classic.  And Dave Epstein punching himself in the face until he fell down was terrific.

IP:  Finally, if your wife gave you a free pass to bang any cartoon chick, who would it be?

AG:  There’s one senior writer on our staff who has a pretty unhealthy crush on Lois, but I would have to go with Princess Jasmine from “Aladdin.”  Or Rosie the robot maid from “The Jetsons.”

GOLDBERG’S TOP 5 THE FAMILY GUY CLIPS

1.  Love this cutaway:

2.  Lost Osama video:

click here to watch

3.  I love this.  Great voice acting:

4.  This is my favorite moment from back in the day Family Guy (I think it’s from Season Two):

5.  You Have AIDS!

click here to watch

Andrew Goldberg, early 90’s style, at his Bar Mitzvah, courtesy of our boy Nick Kroll’s coffee table book Bar Mitzvah Disco.  What a ladies man that Andrew was.  Congrats to him and his wife on their recent one year anniversary, and stay tuned to Westcheddar for classic moments from Prime Time with Dan and Andrew, coming sooner than you can imagine…

Back from Iraq

Interviews, My Dudes, The Good Old Days

Mike Halas (above right with the sunglasses) moved in next door to me on Ogden Avenue back in the 1980’s when I was 9 years old.  He was a year younger, and our families shared a long driveway in between our houses, but it wasn’t long before we basically shared backyards.  His Dad, a direct relative of the Chicago Bears “Poppa Bear” Halas and new head coach of the Columbia University basketball team, put a hoop up in the driveway, and Mike and I spent most of our after school time and weekends playing knockout with his younger brother Johnny (who went on to play in the CBA) and other neighborhood kids.  But in addition to hoops, Mike was always into “army stuff” like watching Platoon and Navy Seals, hanging up pictures of fighter planes in his room, and of course playing the game we all affectionately called “Guns”.

As we got older and closer, our families became FAMILY.  Mike joined the armed forces after attending Johns Hopkins University and in 2004 he was called to duty in Iraq.  Now in 2008, after going back and forth a couple times to war, Mike is home in the United States.  Check out the interview with him below, where Mike talks about his rise through the ranks, his experiences as a platoon leader in Iraq, and what it’s like to be home from war…

IP:  What was it that initially made you want to join the military?

MH:  From as far back as I can remember, I always wanted to be a Soldier.  Both my grandfathers served in the Second World War.  Around the neighborhood, I was always trying to organize games of Manhunt, Capture the Flag, and Cops ‘n’ Robbers (which we called Guns). So basically, I grew up moving through the few wooded areas in the Highlands section of White Plains and pretending I was running operations.

IP:  Tell us about your different levels of training.  I know you’ve gone through some fairly intense shit.  What’s it like getting ready for war and what exactly was your rank?  Did you have guys under you out there, and did your roles/rank/duties change as the war went on?

MH:  I went through ROTC in college and following that I went down to Fort Benning, GA.  At Fort Benning, I first went through the Infantry Officer Basic Course.  In IOBC, we are taught the basics of being an officer in the Army with regards to duties, responsibilities and what is expected of us.  We also learn the rudiments of small unit war-fighting operations, concentrating mostly on squad and platoon level combat operations that included attacks, reconnaissance missions, and ambushes.

Following IOBC, I went to Ranger School.  Ranger School is the preeminent small unit leadership course in the US military.  There you learn not only your own physical and emotional limits, but how to continue to motivate your subordinates when they are at their physical and emotional limits to complete the mission.  It is one of the greatest things that I never want to go through again.  

I went to Airborne School after that and learned how to jump out of airplanes on a static line parachute.  After Ranger School, that school was just a lot of fun.  

All this time I was a 2nd Lieutenant, an O-1, the officer entry level.  I went to Hawaii to report to my first unit, 1st Battalion, 14th Infantry Regiment, “Golden Dragons”.  I pinned on, or was promoted to, 1st Lieutenant, in late November while I was serving as a rifle platoon leader.  As a platoon leader, or PL, I was responsible for a 34 man light infantry rifle platoon.  The lives of 34 soldiers and non-commisioned officers (sergeants) was quite a thrill and a tremendous responsibility for a 24 year old.  It was an incredible job and a fantastic experience.     

IP:  Where were you during the September 11th attacks?  Were you pretty sure that you were headed out to war soon after that?

MH:  I was actually at the Dean’s office dropping a class when I first heard that a plane hit the World Trade Center.  From there, I went straight to my ROTC building and watched the second plane hit.  As I was walking from one to the other, I called my mom and dad to see if they were okay.  My cousin Patrick worked in the South Tower and no one had heard from him.  I found out later that he was late to work that day and had never even been in the building.   

I spent the rest of the day glued to the television in my fraternity house.  Most of my brothers were from the New York, New Jersey, Long Island, and collectively, we knew a lot of people in the city and a lot of people who worked in the Towers. 

Yeah, I was pretty sure we would be headed somewhere after that.  At that moment, I didn’t know where, but figured Afghanistan would be a safe bet.  

 

IP:  Can you remember the day you first touched down over there?  Where were you stationed?  Did you move around alot once you were over there?

MH:  My unit, 1st Battalion, 14th Infantry, the “Golden Dragons”, took off from Hickam Air Force Base in Honolulu, HI on the 19th of January 2004.  We landed in Kuwait at Ali Al Saleem Air Base on or about the 22nd of January 2004.  Like every unit, we spent a couple weeks there in Kuwait training up and getting acclimatized. On Groundhog Day 2004, we crossed the berm and were on our way towards Tuz, a small city of 50 thousand approximately an hour south of Kirkuk.  And boy did we ever move around a lot.  Not more than a few weeks after we took over Tuz from the 173rd ABN BDE, the Golden Dragons became the Division and then MNC-I (Multi-National Coalition-Iraq) reserve.  We spent time in Tall Afar, north by the Syrian border; An Najaf, fighting against Muqtada Al-Sadr and the Madhi Army; Kirkuk; Ad Diwaniyah; Samarra; and Mosul.  The soldiers took to calling our deployment the Golden Dragon Iraqi Tour 2004.  Most units will get into country and be in one place for the duration of their deployment.  We went the other way, not staying in one town for longer than 8 weeks in a 14-month rotation.  

IP:  Take us inside the daily mentals of a soldier at war.  What was going through your head?  Are you so focused that your world back home is blocked out, or is that constantly on your mind?  

MH:  As a rifle platoon leader, I was responsible for 34 soldiers and non-commissioned officers.  They consumed my time.  Planning operations, supervising the execution of orders already given, exercising, discussing with my platoon sergeant and squad leaders about what and how we could improve our platoon’s performance.  There are so many things to do.  I am not a parent, but I can only imagine that it is very similar a feeling to be responsible for the lives of 34 others.  

IP:  Compare yourself to the other guys you were fighting with.  Does everyone kind of share the same mentality towards the war, or is there a lot of clashing ideals and personalities?

MH:  The 34 soldiers I had in my platoon, no two were alike.  You take a handful of kids from all over America and put them into one room, that was my platoon.  There were as many different ideas and backgrounds as there were kids.  Oh, and I refer to everyone in my platoon, except for my platoon sergeant, as one of my kids. Not sure when it started, but that’s how I thought of them.    

IP:   Did your political views about the war shift once you were actually there?  Are most of the people fighting in the war even aware of the politics of it all?

MH:  No, as a young lieutenant, I was fired up and excited to be there and excited to be in the duty position.  

IP:  Do you know anyone personally that died in the war?  What happened?  Tell us about it if you can.

MH:  I do know a few.  And I am sure that as time goes on and we continue to maintain ground forces in Iraq and Afghanistan, there will be more.  It is inevitable and an unfortunate consequence of the profession of military arms.  

My friend Luke Wullenwaber was killed in Iraq in the fall of 2004.  We were in the same IOBC class and we were also in the same platoon during Ranger School.  During Mountain and Florida phases, we were members of the same machine gun team and spent a lot of time together.  He was great guy, a great leader, a great friend.  He is missed.   

IP:  Does it get so violent out there that you get used to shooting at the enemy or being shot at?  How violent is it really on a day to day basis?

MH:  Some days were that violent.  Most days were not.  

IP:  Did you kill anyone?

MH:  I am responsible for the deaths of others.  My platoon killed people and, as a platoon leader, I am entirely responsible for all my platoon does.    

IP:  On a lighter note, what’s the most fun you had over there?  What do you do for entertainment?  Is there time for that, you know, socializing, listening to music, watching movies or sports?

MH:  In different places, we relaxed in different ways.  Some places we had electricity, so we’d watch DVDs or listen to music.  Some places we didn’t have electricity, so we’d play chess, read anything we could get our hands on, and talk.  While we were in Ad Diwaniyah, we stayed in captured Iraqi Army barracks  and there was a sand volleyball court in the middle.  My unit being from the Hawaiian Island of Oahu, we played a lot of “beach” volleyball!

IP:  How do you stay in touch with people back home?  Is email the easiest way?  Can you call home?  How does that work?

MH:  Email was usually the easiest method.  I think the key was typing out all your emails to people before you got to the computer because there was always a time limit and a long line.  So when your turn came, you could copy and paste all the emails sent to you and copy and paste the outgoing ones.  There were opportunities to call home, but I usually left that method for the soldiers to use.  Of course, I did my best to call home on birthdays and special occasions.  

IP:  You went back and forth a couple of times to war?  What was that like, coming home knowing you had to go back?

MH:  The first days being home and the last few days before I went back were always challenging.  But, I really didn’t pay a whole lot of attention to it.  The way I saw it, I had a job to do and Iraq and Afghanistan were where I had to do them.  The biggest change is going from having the freedom to choose where and when you wanted to go to dinner or catch a movie back home to being told when to eat, where to go, etc.  After my first tour in Iraq, I volunteered to go to the 75th Ranger Regiment where I knew I would deploy.  

IP:  What has your life been like since you left the military?  I know you’re still on call as a part of the National Guard, but on a daily basis, what have you been up to?  Are you having fun?  Are you happy?  Are you working?  Where are you living?

MH:  My life has been pretty interesting since I left the Army.  I have traveled all over, seen friends and family that I hadn’t seen in years.  I moved out to the Rocky Mountains and taught little kids how to ski last winter at Beaver Creek in Colorado and I am planning on doing the same thing again this winter.  I have read and read and read and I started to write, as well.  I just recently submitted an article to the NY Times.  Haven’t heard anything back yet, but I am still hopeful.    

IP:  Has it been tough adjusting to life after war?  What have been the challenges for you?  Have you changed mentally, physically, and/or socially?

MH:  At times it is tough and, at others, it is not.  I know that who I am today has been influenced by my time spent overseas.  There are portions of that character that are on both sides of the moral spectrum.  But, good or bad, they are now as much a part of me as growing up in White Plains.  

IP:  Do you watch any of the Iraq War related TV programming or movies?  Have you seen Stop Loss?  Generation Kill?  If so, how realistic or accurate were they?  If not, is there a certain reason why you won’t watch them?

MH:  I don’t make a concerted effort to watch or avoid media regarding the war in Iraq.  I started to watch Stop Loss but didn’t finish.  It was just so Hollywood that it wasn’t entertaining.  I have served with hundreds of soldiers who have done or have been ordered to deploy consecutively.  And, of all the soldiers with whom I have served, every single one reported as ordered for duty.  In the March timeframe of 2004, my platoon got a new sergeant who had just been transferred from the 4th Infantry Division.  He had just served a year tour with 4th ID, got home, received orders to report to the 25th ID and now, about 2 months later, here he was, back in Iraq for another year long tour.  Following our return to Hawaii the next February, he, again, received orders to a new unit and was back in Iraq again.  Three times in as many years. He did not run or complain.  He did not appreciate the constant deployments, but he knew what he signed up for and honored his commitment.

I did not watch, but read, Generation Kill.  I was not a Marine, nor did I participate in the initial invasion, so I cannot attest to the accuracy of their actions.  But, with regards to the relationships and the conversations between soldiers, the book was quite accurate.  

I think the reason that I don’t go out of my way to watch these movies and shows is because I was there.  I have my own memories of how things were and why they were that way.  I don’t need to read a book or watch a movie to help me remember.  But I will watch and read because it is interesting to see what others remember and how they interpret their memories.    

IP:  Obama or McCain?  Does it matter to this war who wins the presidency?

MH:  I will vote in the upcoming election.  But, due to the fact that I am still a commissioned officer, I will hold my opinions of the individual candidates.

IP:  What advice would you give to someone just getting home from the Iraq War? 

MH:  Take your time getting acclimated back into society.  Talk to someone about how you are feeling.  There are many others out there with similar experiences.  You don’t need to keep it bottled up inside.  

*BONUS*

Mike’s Top Five Movies of All Time:

Braveheart

Grosse Pointe Blank

Bull Durham

300

Miracle 

 

Mike’s Top Five CD’s of All Time:

Guns ‘n’ Roses- Appetite for Destruction

Beastie Boys- License to Ill

anything by Jimmy Buffet or Jack Johnson 

(ip’s note: would’ve bet money that the Animal House Soundtrack made this list! ha!)

 

Mike’s Top Five TV Shows of All Time:

Band of Brothers

Rescue Me

The A Team

The Office

Las Vegas

Ip (in skull cap) and Mike (in shorts!) shoveling snow on Ogden Avenue, 1995.

Special thanks to my brother from another mother Mike Halas for taking the time to be interviewed.  You are truly a local hero…Peace…